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Hair On The Soap - 2006 Mix
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A technoriffic ode to a former roommate's mullet droppings. From the Sumophobia remix album, Sumophobia Alpha 2 EX Super Championship Turbo Edition
comedy synth punk worm qu
Artist picture
Comedy synth-punk
Worm Quartet is a Rochester, NY-based band that forcibly staples punk and electronica together and throws them into a blender with hysterically twisted lyrics. They have been featured repeatedly on the Dr. Demento show, and had the most requested song of 2004 with the ex-girlfriend rant "Great Idea For A Song," collaborated with Sudden Death on the most requested song of 2005 "Inner Voice," and had the 2nd most requested song of 2002 with the anti-drummer anthem "Frank’s Not In The Band Anymore." Yowza. The sole member of Worm Quartet is a 6’4” 280-lb. bemulleted manic who insists on being called “Shoebox" and who poses by day as a mild-mannered software engineer. Worm Quartet is currently playing all over the damned place whenever possible to support the new CD "Mental Notes." More information can be found at www.wormquartet.com.
Song Info
Genre
Podcasts • Comedy
Charts
Peak #31
Peak in subgenre #13
Author
Timothy F. Crist
Rights
2000 Timothy F. Crist
Uploaded
February 14, 2006
Track Files
MP3
MP3 3.3 MB • 128 kbps • 3:37
Story behind the song
I wrote the lyrics when I was bored and the music when I was pissed.
Lyrics
There’s a hair on my soap An ugly little thing A little pubic souvenir upon my Irish Spring There’s a hair on my soap It’s curly, long, and fine There’s a hair on the soap And I don’t think it’s mine My roommate must have used it Cuz I see his soap is gone It was just a sliver yesterday And now it has passed on I feel for his predicament But still it isn’t fair Just cuz he used up his Ivory Why should I bathe in his hair? There’s a hair on my soap A hair on my soap Can’t rinse it off, can’t scrape it off, I don’t know how to cope With this hair on my soap This hair on my soap I just thought I’d take a shower, But I’ve given up all hope The water’s pouring down on me And splashing in the drain The shampoo’s running in my eyes I’m wincing from the pain I can’t deal with the horror Of this most disgusting find This sample of his DNA My roommate left behind I look around the tub My other roommate’s soap is there It’s shiny white and barely used Devoid of pubic hair So I used it and I put it back Where it’s supposed to go And I think that it’s the perfect crime But little do I know I left a hair on his soap A hair on his soap Well at least it’s lest disgusting Than to find one in your Scope There’s a hair on the soap A hair on the soap The cycle goes forever And I don’t know how to cope There’s a hair on the soap A hair on the soap Even in the yuppie bathrooms Where they hang it on a rope They still find hair on the soap Yes hair on the soap And no one of us is safe Hell, I’d even bet the pope Has found a hair on the soap A hair on the soap Could be from somebody’s balding head Or from their anal slope There’s a hair on the soap A hair on the soap Could be from a person, from a dog, Or from an antelope There’s a hair on the soap A hair on the soap If you ask me if I like it I’ll just have to tell you nope There’s a hair on the soap A hair on the soap I’m running out of rhymes now And I really have to grope… (C) 2000 Timothy F. Crist
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