Pretend That It Feels Good(even if you hate it)
From the album, "Cryptomeria". Originally recorded at Brain Candy Studios in 2000 during the sessions for the Mike Ash album, "Wearing Your Skin".
mike ash
decaying enterprises
decaying orbit
Story behind the song
This is a song about surviving being victimized. I was a victim of molestation/sexual assault as a child & this song was my intense cathartic purge on the issue. I truly hope that this song reaches someone it can help, someone who can relate to it's message, or at the very least, if it makes one person feel less alone as a victim, then I have achieved my goal!!! YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!!! YOU CAN LIVE THROUGH THIS AND OVERCOME IT!!!! YOU REALLY CAN!!!!
Lyrics
maybe I've told you, but I'll say it again,
I couldn't hate you, but I could pretend,
pretend that I like it, pretend that it feels good,
pretend that you Love me, yeah and maybe you could,
I'll just pretend that I'm sleeping,
I'll just pretend I'm alive....hey I wish you could save me,
but don't you bother to try,
the party's over and it wasn't that great,
so you better savor every thing on your plate,
every flavor, every taste,
the building of character, the growing of pain....
it's not all that bad, but it's not alright,
none of it's wrong, I live like I type,
fast and with a lot of mistakes,
sometimes your just going to feel that way....
and I want to hurt you, I want to hurt you, I want to hurt you,
drive those nails through my thick skull,
give me peace, just a piece of your lull,
I think I can make it, I think I can fake it for now....
hey I hear that you broke all of your mirrors,
along with every heart you've encountered,
you live life like a hand grenade that went off in my face,
but in some strange way, I'm drawn to you,
but every time you push me farther,
I just hold on tighter and tighter.....
Lyrics By: Mike Ash
(C)Decaying Enterprises 2017