License   $0.00
Free download
Traditional country. Accessorize with hip hop scratchy nonsense and coarse lyrics to match.
dance rap hip hop beats experimental country uk funny comedy bluegrass explicit remix redneck wrong offensive sarcastic
Creative Commons license
Commercial uses of this track are NOT allowed.
Adaptations of this track are NOT allowed to be shared.
You must attribute the work in the manner specified by the artist.
Artist picture
Hip hop hillbillies or redneck rappers? With funk driven samples meshed with timeless bluegrass elements and country rap they create experimental trailer trash
Infamous Texan turd Rampant Jake Bullets is back, taking a forced break from the acoustic ska funk kuntry of Buckweet he presents the soundtrack to the new revolution with the album "The Hysterectomiser". Adding a funky edge to his traditional bluegrass roots, barn storming hip hop, country rap, coarse lyrics and mistimed twangdoodles. This is a harsh tangent to previous malcontent melodies but should help you, the listener, to dig a little further into the depths of this bearded monkey twizzler. HIP HOP HILLBILLIES? REDNECK RAPPERS? YOU DECIDE. (and then we'll ignore you anyway)
Song Info
Genre
Country • Alternative Country
Charts
#7,334 today Peak #92
#1,291 in subgenre Peak #18
Author
Rampant Jake Bullets
Rights
Rampant Jake Bullets Moonshine Jug Band
Uploaded
January 07, 2006
Track Files
MP3
MP3 5.2 MB • 128 kbps • 5:39
Story behind the song
Many wives I have had. I wanted another. But although she was fatter than Elvis she also had ideas of her own. Bad move in a marriage.
Lyrics
You know I was dreading my latest last wedding Because I was sober and I didn't have a weapon pressing Into my back, how did I attract her? Her wedding dress was stained with chewing tobacco This is the result it's the end of her game The only thing we had in common was the same surname But if I'm to be honest I'll tell you the truth We share a love of country and we shared the same womb The poison dart of Cupid had struck me in the chest Like the Washington sniper of romantic interest As she walked down the aisle to be wife number five I was waiting for her to say "Hey you guys" Our love is a fairytale, it is a dream That may be but it's Beauty and the Obese She'll cry without fail 'cos she's fat and she's frail She's double the blubber like an emo whale Her jeans always sagged from the weight that they packed Her ass looked like she'd been shoplifting hams The clashing and gnashing of her thighs would appal us Like tectonic plates on a planet made of walrus And a nicotine patch in the shape of James Dean Next to a tattoo that read USMC For once in my life I'd do what is right Swallow pride and valium and make her my wife As we exchanged vows, I kinda wish now Her's was a vow of silence "Like Jordan Chandler?" For richer for poorer, 'til I really annoy her 'Til I download Metallica and I'm savaged by lawyers She's suspicious that she's heading for trouble 'COS LIFE AIN'T NOTHING BUT DITCHES AND SHOVELS Past the honeymoon stage I'll start digging your grave But it's never my fauly you'll be pushing those stalks (chorus) Didn't know wht it was stuck in my head A thought recurring and I wish I was dead Another figure in my log of regret I can't believe that you said "No" Didn't know what it was stuck in my head A new beginning when I thought I was dead I can have another last cigarette I can't believe that you said "No way" I've been married before but never divorced I'm a widowing vessel on a marital course I've stood by more big holes in the ground Than an Iraqi building surveyor I found My first wife Edna she's a little bit dead-na A Russian space probe hit her right on the head-na So I said "Bugger, I don't want to lug her To the cemetery I mean why should I bother?" So I thought "F*** it" now she fits in a bucket When it came down why didn't she duck it Now she lives in my freezer I thought it might please her Not being shot in to the sun like Mother Teresa My second wife Dorothy, oh she was a horror-thy The anniversary of her death if tomorrow-thy One day she said-o "I'm off to the meadow" By quarter past nine she was stone f*** ing dead-o I guess that you know a Russian space probe Struck her, caught fire, but did not explode Hit her on the bracket so I said "Fack it" I call her anthrax girl now she fits in a packet My third wife Martha she used to be Arthur She said the sex change was a total disaster Tit's were lopsided so I decided To send her to the field just a little misguided When she didn't come back in I knew she was lacking A pulse, a head and her spine was a-cracking I admit I was planning it and now she's inanimate We can make love 'cos she had been banning it My fourth wife Hilda was butch as a builder I thought no way space debris would've killed her I stand corrected as I went and collected Her body which had that Mansfield aesthetic Her head was impacted to the size of a matchstick It seems the Russians are getting better through practice Spread like a thighmaster all over the pasture From the gator to the crater she should've mover faster (chorus) I felt like an idiot as my girl in a million Walked down the aisle to the theme from Deliverance She looked at me angrily what was in store for me? A honeymoon packed with sun, sea and sodomy? If Salvador Dali was an architect Or if they made a JFK Mr P
Song Likes
On 6 Playlists
Comments
Please sign up or log in to post a comment.