Coming Down Happy

OH, HELLO. After writing songs since he was 5 years old and performing in bands since he was 9, Jared Woods (hatched and grown in Cape Town, South Africa), realised what was wrong. It was the simple essence of bands themselves: a collaborative collection of ideas which ultimately resulted in compromised visions and a cock-measuring competition of egos. It was with this epiphany that the protagonist figured out a new route to fully express his musical passion. Going solo. It was genius, as this approach ensured that the band would never have any reason to break-up, and that he and himself would hardly ever argue about direction. It’s the whole “if you want something done right...” cliche, all over again. So after lengthy conversations in his mind on the cold cobbled streets outside London pubs (where Jared had since relocated to chase the dream), Coming Down Happy was born. But despite the fact that the seed was planted as early as 2008, it took over 4 years for our hero to stop picking his nose and smelling his own farts, eventually finding the strength needed to grant this project its final lift-off, in 2012. The reasons for this delay were many, and not exclusively a result of laziness. No, instead this hindrance was owed above all else, to the approach in which Jared had chosen to release said songs, by creating something much more elaborate than your average musical project. Inspired by a recent lengthy heartbreak he had endured in 2009, the center of Coming Down Happy told the fictional tale of one rockstar named LegoTrip, who meets an evil girl that curses him with her poisonous vagina, causing him to fall deeply and irrationally in love with her. This story was not only communicated via the means of lyrics, but also with the aid of a comicesque-musical, each song supported by hundreds of cartoon images, carefully stitched together in video format, introducing a surreal world of characters and events. The whole concept was to be composed, sung, rapped, screamed, mixed, drawn, video-edited, and web-designed/developed by Jared Woods alone, and all of it available to the masses for free (with a planned comic book in the works, too). The project was so intricate, in fact, that the boy had convinced himself that when the original 4 part EP was released, he would surely be propelled into superstardom. No such luck, as almost the opposite took place. Due to the careless practice of mentioning real people and situations by name, blurring the line between reality and fiction, the outlet encouraged a vicious backlash to ensue, resulting in hate mail from anonymous listeners as well as his own parents, and even some seriously violent threats to his well-being. But this didn’t bother Jared as much as the lack of fame did, and he fell into a deep depression for months following. However, time has been good to the healing process, and the show must go on. And even in those dark days, Jared never once turned his back on the music, always letting the ideas stew, calculating his next move. A couple of even less successful singles later, and he was ready to continue the story he had started, following the turmoil of LegoTrip once again, observing the fight against misery in The Black EP sequel. This 4-track offering will be released song-by-song sporadically over 2013, in hopes that our cartoon friend may find some peace, and that Jared may find some fame. But regardless of outcomes, one thing's for certain: this abrasive, sample-heavy, multi-media, genre-crossing musical approach (standing currently as a hybrid of hip-hop flows, metal screams, horrorcore contexts, dark electropop ideals, scat scoobi-doo-bahs, dubstep drops, trip-hop sleeps, house-music satires, post-punk deliveries, raggamuffin irieness, and drum 'n' bass breaks - to name a few) featuring perverted adults themes (subjects including genitalia, mensturation, ejaculation, devirginizing, Satanism, blasphemy, suicide, abortions and murder) which are unnecessarily offensive without losing a sense of humour and cartoon cheerfulness... will always be completely unsignable, unmarketable or indescribable. But, hey, at least it will give you something to do with your afternoon.