A retro tribute to my wife, the eternal prom queen!
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This song, while rife with poetic liscense and embellishment, is nonetheless largely biographical and my wife's annual birthday tribute!
I was a skinny dweeb, and my hair was a mess,
I played in the band, I even played chess,
You shoulda seen her then, she was a perfect ten,
With her cherry lips and that porcelain skin,
I wore loud shirts, the girls stayed away,
It could have been my clothes, it could have been the plague,
She had all the guys by their prep-school ties,
Wrapped around her finger with her big brown eyes,
The other nerds and I, in the school cafeteria,
Watched her walk by, it was nerd hysteria,
I said one day boys, were gonna be a pair,
They said When monkeys fly out of you know where!
I wanted the prom queen, I wanted my high school teenage dream,
I wanted the prom queen, and you know exactly what I mean.
Just a couple years later and Im on my way to work,
And shes fighting with this guy, I think she called him a jerk,
So I drove her home, she still knew my name,
She said the games not over and Im tired of playin,
We pulled up to her door, I was sayin my prayers,
She said the good ones are taken, the rest are all players,
I said, tell me about it, lifes just not fair,
Then I felt her fingers running through my hair,
I married the prom queen, I married my high school teenage dream,
I married the prom queen, and you know exactly what I mean.
She thought she wanted a goon with a ripplin 6-pack
A hamster sized brain, hair on his back,
A sagging tattoo she thought would protect her,
Until she looked past, my pocket protector.
I struck gold, I think youll agree,
Girls like her dont look at guys like me,
But damn the cliches, full speed ahead,
She looked with her heart, and not with her bed,
There was this guy named Butch, back in 10th grade math,
He gave me a swirly while his friends just laughed,
Now he works at the plant and his wife does too,
He weighs three hundred pounds and his wife 302,
We were walkin through the mall, my girl was by my side,
She said isnt that Butch and his lovely bride?
They were in the food court at the taco stand,
So we mosied up, we were hand in hand,
He knew me right away, and his jaw hit the floor,
First he rubbed his eyes, and then he rubbed a little more,
He said hey its the prom queen and that skinny dweeb,
But he gave a high five cause he couldnt believe, believe, believe,
I married the prom queen, I married my high school teenage dream,
I married the prom queen, and you know exactly what I mean