Update from the Planet Gryzlyrg (pronounced Zi-lurg)
Story behind the song
Like the majority of over-blown space epic productions that have occured in the last century this one to is disjointed in it's chronological presentation. Some would cynically suggest that it is merely down to the commercial aspects of making up a sequel when the unleashing of Asparupuss on an unsuspecting planet struck greater fear on the inhabitants of Earth than was anticipated.
Was the time right to exploit the masses and to bolt another chapter onto the previous yarn?
Decide for yourself but the quaffers of the barely drinkable brown beverage available at the Coffee House in Sonarland have known for a long time the evil doings of Bing the Berciless for aoens, and as if by way of proof of that their combined age goes back even further than that.
Nay, they have been patiently waiting to introduce the bad news to those that inhabit the pleasant grassy vales of the planet Earth whilst trying to postpone the inevitable arrival of the product of Bing's appaling personal hygeine standards.
Today nobody need blame the strangest smells on the family dog, tis true enough Bing is on his way and those left standing will have to set aside gentler pursuits more normally associated with the human race, like suing the neighbours over parking rights, and unify to join in the fight against evil itself which will become manifest in the 24/7 stench of the Berciless ones armpit aroma that will pervade the sweet smelling air we currently know and love!
This then as a familiarization excercise for you warriors soon to be is the first chapter dating from the pre-history of the despicable Bing the Berciless depicting the black hole of filth from which he/it/that emerged.
A song from the tortured archive of the fatigued cosmic war veterans Steve Strummer and Ed Kocols' minds strap yourself down and inflict upon yourselves....
The Hall of the Mountian Bing.
Featuring a Production Cast of 1000's including.
Space Cowboy: as the Narrator.
Oh Grant: on Laser Lead Guitars.
Steve Strummer: for the solid fortress of Sound.
Bapu/That Or Ed: Subsonic planetary re-alignment.
Alex the Kook: Electronic synthesized force fields.
Misty: for adding to the Fog and taking delivery of a new car.
Qoqol: Primal screams.
The Bouy: Rataplan
Engineered, Mixed and Mastered by Bapu/That or Ed.
Lyrics
Hall of the Mountain Bing
Verse 1
Long before time had any persistence
Darkness and light battled for first place
The only solution was equal existence
On the continuum of time and space
Here is an old and truly hidden story
Locked away in time, inside an ancient glory
Some have never believed the words I’m told
But once they were heard the truth did unfold
Chorus:
Somewhere out there is an evil
With one desire, a total upheaval
In the Hall of the Mountain Bing
Surely the most evil thing
Lurks in the corner
Like little Jack Horner
Waiting to be crowned king (That’s Bing)
Verse 2
He laid waste to soup, he cast it aside
He dreamed of a future where everything died
Not knowing the damage he caused out there
He’d do it again, and he just wouldn’t care
When evil was crowned in a time far away
The minions did hide, they’d quietly pray
With passage of time, they came to believe
What this evil king, in time would achieve
Chorus:
Somewhere out there is an evil
With one desire, a total upheaval
In the Hall of the Mountain Bing
Surely the most evil thing
Lurks in the corner
Like little Jack Horner
Waiting to be crowned king (He’s Bing)
(solo)
Chorus:
In the Hall of the Mountain Bing
Surely the most evil thing
Lurks in the corner
Like little Jack Horner
Waiting to be crowned king (He’s Bing)
He's Bing
Beware
That's Bing
Beware